By Anna Geannopoulos
We women are all basically drag queens. We are constantly plucking our eyebrows, shaving our legs, waxing our (not-so-peach-fuzz) mustaches and getting rid of underarm, bikini and foot hair. It’s quite a task and I’d prefer not to do it. In fact, all of winter break I let my hair run rampant and despite a couple bikini-clad hot tub situations, I don’t think I really offended anyone.
Since I’m half-Greek (check the last name), I’m painfully aware of my au naturel unibrow, mustache and unwanted body hair. I’ve tried every possible method to get rid of it and have come to accept the fact that my legs will never obtain perfect silky smoothness.
But for all of you out there still trying to reach that Holy Grail, here is what you need to know about each removal method.
Bleaching, Nair and Veet:
I group these together because they are all chemical-based solutions. Bleaching is good for areas where you do not want to make the hair follicles thicker by shaving, but it only really blends in if you have pale skin. Nair and Veet may work for people who are thicker skinned, but I tend to avoid it because anything that can’t be in contact with your skin for more than 10 minutes really shouldn’t be around your skin in the first place.
Shaving:
This is a quick, cheap, temporary fix for a persistent problem and the most common form of hair removal. If done with care it is pain-free, but once you start shaving you are doomed to harsh stubble and the hair follicles grow back thicker each time you shave. I try to avoid it unless I’m in a pinch since usually my legs get a five o’ clock shadow an hour after I lather them up.
Waxing:
Ideally, my hair removal regime would involve a trusty esthetician and monthly waxing appointments. But I’m not made out of money. I invested in a wax pot of my own a year ago and although the results can last up to a month, waxing is messy and to some it can be very painful. Waxing yourself is also time consuming (sometimes one leg can take me up to two hours to complete), and I’ve never been able to nab every hair each time around.
Epilators and tweezing:
With the same longer lasting effects as waxing without a lot of the sticky mess, epilators are basically a mechanical set of tweezers. I enjoy the results but have also found that cheaper epilators ($30-$40 range) aren’t able to get every hair each time. They also have no storing area for the hair, so it flies everywhere (a dust storm of hair is not for the weak of heart).
Like waxing, the sensation of epilating is not necessarily pleasant but tolerable. I would recommend them to people who want to reduce the appearance of body hair but don’t really care if their legs are perfectly smooth.
Laser Hair Removal:
Marketed as a way to finally get rid of all your hair once and for all, most laser hair removal works, but not completely. After getting five leg and upper lip treatments, the amount of hair on me that physically grew decreased is decreased, but I still have plenty of active follicles to deal with. Laser hair technology may have gotten more effective in the six years since I’ve had anything done but it is also very expensive and not worth the risk of things not working out.
It was by far the most painful hair removal method I’ve been through (they basically kill your hair follicles by burning them) and you’re not allowed to expose your skin to the sun for the five weeks it takes to complete the treatment.
The only perfect solution I see is going back in time and convincing everyone that body hair is sexy. But alas, history chose to promote this cruel trick of beauty. On the bright side, you have plenty of time to experiment with all these removal methods because your hair will just keep growing back.
