Featured image courtesy of acozykitchen.com
Written by Amy Stoltenberg
Working as a bartender in an organic restaurant brings me into daily contact with a certain type of person. I wait in expectation for their quirks to be revealed by the universe as each customer brings their unique energy into my alcoholic kingdom.
Dave sat down at the bar while I was rearranging the beer fridge and ordered an organic salad with a side of kale chips. Check and check. As a small pleasure of my life is giving unsuspecting health snobs a hard time about their conscientious dining choices, I suggested he better order a cookie to balance his feast out. Dave doesn’t eat cookies. I moved the Stellas to the far right and pushed the Nordeast to the back.
While waiting on the kale chips to crisp up, I noticed Dave setting up his work station at the bar: a legal pad, mechanical pencil and a copy of the “Tao Te Ching.” One of the things that makes me such an exemplary bartender is my unbridled nosiness into the lives of other people. I decided the beer would have to remain in disarray.
As I casually stood, wiping down the same spot on the counter for 20 minutes, Dave and I began to discuss the concept of spirituality, what it means to be the master of oneself and the ultimate nature of the Tao.
Eventually, my early evening drinking crowd arrived and I was soon reminded that my job at the bar includes more than discussing the deepest points of the universe. Dave and I agreed to continue our talk at a late-night tea emporium uptown.
Over two turmeric ginger teas at midnight, Dave and I took turns quoting our favorite parts of the “Tao Te Ching,” and reveling in our own profoundness. I was raised in a Christian home, and still consider God to be one of my closest homies, but I think most belief systems hold some sort of truth. It felt pretty good to show off my recent studies into the teachings of Laozi, and to have someone to bounce questions and ideas off of.
Discussion with Dave was a welcome departure from the usual date-time small talk about local weather conditions and personal fun facts that makes dating so tedious in the first place. In the fast-paced world we live in, I think sometimes people (especially of the young, ambitious variety) sort of forget to have an opinion on topics bigger than the scope of their everyday lives. It was refreshing to talk with someone who also enjoyed spending time pondering the deeper aspects of humanity and life.
My night with Dave was the first date I came away from feeling like I had gained something. It was invigorating to discuss something so interesting to me, exciting to find someone who shared this interest.
Dave comes in a few times a week now and sits at the bar to keep me company while I finish off his kale chips. We haven’t discussed the role of the Tao in contemporary wedding ceremonies yet, and judging from my lack of desire to tenderly feed him kale chips in a sweet embrace, we probably never will. Our date was, however, the first mentally mature, mutually enjoyable date that I’ve been on, and for that I say good karma to both of us!
