Written by Kaitlynne Rainne, Photo courtesy of Wolf Trap
Soul. Bravery. Virtue.
The perfect words to describe the 2020 Virtuoso Award recipient, Jennifer Hudson. Throughout her “In Conversation” session, Hudson reflected on the beginning of her career as well as her most memorable moments.
“I go for the real, the raw and the emotional,” said Hudson, “Not only can I really dive deep into the characters I play but I can express myself and give a little of myself with each performance.”
Growing up, there were many times where I would have to “toughen up” or put on a smile as I walked through life because there wasn’t time to stop. I was told that Black women need to be tough. We can’t afford to wallow in the hurt because, as I heard many times throughout my life, “ain’t nobody going to be there to pull us out.”
Despite the warnings, in the late hours of the night when the world is asleep, I pull out my journal or open my current project and let the words flow from me without fear of vulnerability. Writing has given me that opening, like Hudson, my craft gives me the space I need to give a little of myself.
It hasn’t always been easy, and Hudson acknowledges this. When she starred in “Chi Raq,” the role she played hit too close to home. Having lost her mother, brother and nephew to gun violence, Hudson accepted the role as way to tell the story and to save her home. When asked how she spoke of the support she had from those off-screen.
I ask myself, given the chance to tell a story that hit close to home, would I? Yes. I would in a heartbeat. There is something about telling real and raw stories that leaves me humbled. It keeps me going because each story told leads me to where I need to go. For Hudson, it was to play Aretha Franklin in the upcoming biopic “Respect.”
I don’t know where I am being led, but Hudson eased those worries. “Keep doing what you’re doing and don’t close any doors,” she said, “At the end of the day, nothing is simply just. Everything leads to everything.”
If Hudson had turned away from each impactful, emotional and raw story, she would not have made it to where she is today. She is a respected black woman with a powerful voice, literally and metaphorically. I look at my own journey and I am making the choice to keep choosing the path that requires me to give a little of myself. The emotional. The raw. The real.
I am a real woman, yet there is still a little girl in me that has so much more she wants to say. Who am I to deny her the right to express herself completely?
