“Love, Barbara” tells a touching story about real love

Written by Erin Kay Shaw. Photo courtesy of IMDb.

Though the documentary is brief, “Love, Barbara,” directed by Byrdie O’Connor, is a touching expression of love.

The introductory scene was especially moving. Barbara Hammer, a notable queer filmmaker, and Florrie Burke are seen exchanging wedding bands while wearing purple feather boas and huge smiles on their faces. Watching this scene felt like being invited into a particularly special moment. I was honored to be there, despite my suddenly damp cheeks.

Hammer was interested in archiving her lifetime of multimedia works before and during her time with cancer. Burke was hesitant about doing the archival work in her stead, even telling Hammer, “Don’t ask me to do it.” Burke eventually realized, “I can do this,” and went on to unearth and preserve much of Hammer’s more personal artworks. Hammer “galloped” through life, and Burke intended to preserve that feeling.

The pivotal scene of the documentary is eerie and intimate. We see Burke sitting in an empty theater, replete with fabric-covered folding seats and walls so dark they melt into the background. In a self-recorded video diary entry, Hammer appears onscreen, peeking between a bouquet of flowers. Hammer says, “Some days are hard without you.” 

They were simple words, but they struck me. In both love and grief, some days are harder than others. But then, sometimes, you remember the light in their eyes or the sound of their laugh and the day is somehow less dark and dusty. I suppose that is what genuine love does – provides you with a sense of trust and comfort unknown beforehand, something inherently evident in Hammer and Burke’s relationship. Hammer poignantly refers to their bond as one of “sustainable love,” a beautiful concept.

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