Ten from the Top: Things I have definitively learned as a 20-something
Ten from the Top is the weekly column of the very honest and often snarky thoughts of District’s editor-in-chief.
20-somethings are the start of something big here. We are strong! We are fearless! We are adults! We are… tired, really confused and we are going to pretend like we are excited about it!
1. I am an adult:
And not the “I just turned 18 and so I am legally an adult” adult but the “I pay bills and worry about things like taxes” adult which makes me an undeniable adulting adult. I think.
2. Slang is stupid:
Turnt up? What? On fleek, what is a fleek? Just say words I know, please, I can’t urban dictionary our whole conversation.
3. I owe my parents everything:
I had an award ceremony when I was in middle school where the speaker said that our parents owned everything we have except our personality until we turn 18 which is something my Dad never, ever, ever would let me forget. I never realized though, that I owe pretty much about everything in my personality to them too because I am who I am because of what I really wanted to reflect from them or you know, not.
4. I have no idea what is going on:
Do I really need to know what the latest version of something is or what celebrity did what or what was so shocking to like the whole internet? No, I am trying to remember things like buying milk so I can drink my coffee.
5. No one else has any idea what is going on:
Real adults like our parents or bosses just learned to fake it after years of being asked questions they don’t have a clue about either. This is how they succeed in adulting, pay attention to them and fake it until you make it.
6. You better like your job:
Now hopefully we will all like our career, but I’m talking here about just the ridiculous minimum wage/student employment job you drag yourself to so that you can buy more than Ramen and actually pay your student loans kind of on time. You don’t deserve to be miserable for minimum wage! I promise, just keep looking until you score a job at that coffee shop or clothing store that you actually don’t dread so much.
7. Invest in adult-like pleasures:
Oh no, not those. Get your minds out of the gutter. I’m talking about clothes that won’t fall apart after three washes and name brand dish soap here.
8. My actions are now accountable:
Childhood ends the first time you fall asleep on the couch and woke-up there the next day, that is it, we need to move on from there because otherwise it just goes down hill. Mommy will no longer save you if you miss a meeting or didn’t finish an assignment, or at least I really hope she doesn’t. So pick yourself up and get a calendar or something because it is time to be responsible!
9. I am above nothing:
I will take any job, eat just about anything, say yes to any invitation I get and if someone offers help I will definitely take them up on it. Life is tough and so any chance you get to make it a little, tiny bit easier do not pass it up.
10. I have to give back what I take:
Karma dictates that if I am above nothing I better be above helping no one too or bad juju is going down. Which means sharing the rest of my milk, cheerleading friends through breakups and all nighters and yes, even volunteering. Being responsible is doing it but being an adult is actually liking that you are doing it.
