Ten from the Top: things I should really stop doing
Ten from the Top is the weekly column of the very honest and often snarky thoughts of District’s editor-in-chief.
OK, we all have bad habits. Some bite their nails quietly, others tap their feet hard enough to shake my desk two rows back. I have quite a few things that I really should stop but I highly doubt I’m going to anytime soon. Oh well.
1. Doing things at stop lights,
like eating, texting, doing makeup, digging for my phone, drawing assignments and writing a column. Hey I’m busy, so sue me.
2. Buying coffee when I can clearly make it at home,
where it usually tastes better for FAR less.
3. Calling people by pet names instead of their actual names.
I call everyone I know well, and plenty I don’t know by sweetie, darling, doll, angel and cutie. I’m just an affectionate person. Accept my love already and ignore that I can’t remember your name.
4. Texting three or more people at the same time.
It is way more confusing than helpful to everybody. Especially me.
5. Time for a classic: I crack my knuckles all the time.
Not just fingers either, how about wrists, shoulders, neck, ankles and back.
6. Leaving junk all over my car.
Things like granola bars, textbooks, empty pens, a plastic ball, my left shoe, a child’s car seat, a coloring book with a box of crayons, my phone charger, someone else’s phone charger, coats and coffee creamer. I think someone could live a happy life surviving on just the things left in my passenger seat.
7. Approaching anyone who has a dog. Any dog.
I’m pretty sure this would be the most statistically likely way I will get kidnapped. But they are just so cute, yes you are, yes you are so cute!
8. I want to be trendy but I will never be trendy and I should just accept this.
I just can’t wear rompers, or headbands or strapless anything. Sigh, the support group will be meeting on Friday.
9. Having dessert after lunch.
Which will in no way lessen my need for sweets at all times of the day but does increase other thighs. I mean things.
10. Judging people for little things.
I love people (see #3), but I will judge you mercilessly for stupid things like how many selfies you take or who makes the best coffee in town. Feel free to try and prove me wrong, though it will cost you a coffee.