Written by Anna Robertson
Romantic and family relationships have been portrayed on the big screen countless times. Most of them are a stiff, trite picture of the everyday dysfunctional family plagued by either teenage angst or marital troubles. This everyday family with everyday troubles can be a nice escape from reality, but offers nothing of any substance. “The Big Sick” gets to the root of not only what can tear a family and a relationship apart, but what will eventually bring both back together.
The true story of Kumail Nanjiani and his wife, Emily Gordon, is not an average boy-meets-girl kind of story. It is the opposite of the romantic comedy cliche that feeds the audience with one-dimensional main characters looking for love in the big city. The character interactions, especially between Kumail and Emily’s parents—played by Holly Hunter and Ray Romano—are comically awkward, but in the exact way they should be. Hunter captures the audience with her sharp, feisty attitude. She is a mother in the tender, loving moments with Emily, but she effortlessly transitions to a strong woman that stands up for what she believes in, even if it means fighting two young men that had previously been shouting anti-Islamic remarks at Kumail.
We see the personalities in the characters and we know who they are, how they see the world, how they feel about others and what their values are. Take, for example, the interaction between Kumail and his brother, Naveed. They are having lunch at the batting cages, and Naveed teases Kumail for his disinterest—or inability—to grow a beard like him and finally give in to his mother pressuring him to marry. It is clear to the audience that Islam and Islamic traditions run deeper than blood in Kumail’s family.
Marrying outside the faith, to the Nanjiani family, is completely out of the question. The audience sees one example of this by the father mentioning Kumail’s cousin. They are no longer allowed to speak to him, as Kumail would later reveal to Emily. His father does not even recognize the marriage between the cousin and his wife, referring to her as “that white woman he is living with” even when they are expecting a baby.
Which brings us to the undertone of the story. Kumail’s character shows audiences that he is not as emotionally or spiritually involved in Islam than his devout parents. At the beginning of the movie he is shown in his parents’ house and is asked to pray before dinner. He promptly heads into a private room, sets a timer for how long traditional Islamic prayers are held, and spends the time playing video games. Kumail is also uninterested in arranged marriages, which are “just called marriage[s]” in his home country of Pakistan. Unwilling to accept any way outside her religion, his mother insists on bringing to dinner Pakistani women that she considers good candidates for marriage.
“The Big Sick” asks the question that is timeless, yet has never been more prevalent in modern times; will religions like Islam and Christianity have to change in order to accommodate for the modernization of society? Forcing arranged marriages upon Kumail almost caused him to lose Emily, the woman that he would later marry, but proclaiming his love for the dying Emily to his parents caused them to write him out of the family.
This film will pull you in. It is engaging, fun and effortlessly written. Never once will you feel a closer bond with characters in a film. There is so much love, whether it be the love Kumail feels for Emily, or the love he feels for his family. Kumail does not give up once in the film, whether it be his refusal to leave his family forever or give up on Emily. If the awkward hilarity and sheer accessibility of the film does not fully absorb you, the passionately told story of true love will.
