By Jordan Wannemacher
Aw. Teen love. This week on “Teen Mom 2,” the girls find and re-find love. Isn’t that great news? Not so quick.
Jenelle
My favorite white trash mom, Jenelle, met a new guy this week. Of course he is also jobless, carless and apparently doesn’t even have a license. What a nice male role model you’ve found for your baby, Jenelle.
After staying out all night with her loser boyfriend she comes home “not hungover.” She’s just tired, nauseated and has a headache.
I’m pretty sure that’s a hangover.
I still can’t fathom why Jenelle, or anyone for that matter, would date someone who is going to affect your positive progression in life. Of course he’s going to affect your schoolwork. If you can’t come home at a decent hour to take care of your child because of him, how do you think you’re going to drag yourself to your community college?
Follow my cardinal rule: Is the guy helping you better yourself as a person in society? No? Then dump him.
Oh, also, if he says “you’re like hot s***,” that’s another reason to run in the opposite direction.
Chelsea
Chelsea, Chelsea, Chelsea…still being an idiot and still not listening to your father. He’s about to get sick of you quickly if you don’t cut this Adam situation off.
I feel really betrayed by her roommate, Katie, too. I thought Katie was on my side. Why isn’t Katie overruling Chelsea on letting Adam move in? Be a good friend, Katie. Slap Chelsea and take the baby to Chelsea’s dad. Put Chelsea and Adam on the street.
Kailyn
Oh man, poor Kailyn. Really, that girl’s life is so depressing. I hate even watching her segment of the show because it’s so depressing. What is wrong with her mother? What is she even doing that she can’t help her daughter out with school—or anything for that matter?
She’s not setting the best example for Kailyn on how to be a good mother, because, quite frankly, she’s terrible. Throw your poor daughter a couple bucks every once in awhile. It’s the least you can do since you’re convinced deserting her is a “distance makes the heart grow fonder” kind of deal. Wrong.
Even if it is just so she can bum $600 off of him, at least Kailyn and Joe are “back together.” That should make life easier. Then again, nothing is ever easy for Kailyn.
Leah
Corey and Leah are now back together, signing a new lease and moving in together. All of this is only after being back together for just over a week. I’m not surprised. Making irrational, quick decisions is not out of character for either of these Appalachian lovers.
What’s that Leah? You have to rush things when you have kids? Did it ever occur to you that “rushing into things” is kind of what got you in your position in the first place?
We’ll see how this trainwreck continues to derail faster and faster off of a cliff next week. Kailyn may not be the only homeless mom. I’m looking at you, Chelsea.
Just remember, kids, teen pregnancy is 100 percent preventable.
